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No f***ing in the park. 7/9/2003
For years people went to the local park to have sex. Finally,
some citizens petitioned and a law was passed forbidding
sex in the park. Signs were put up everywhere. One couple
had been having sex in the park since it was built and were
determined to continue. They were going hot and heavy behind
some bushes when a cop came by and arrested them. Three black
men witnessed the couple ...
0 Comments, 16 Views,
111 Votes
,7.70 Score |
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A Leprechaun goes into a bar...... 7/6/2003
....climbs up on a bar stool, and says, "Bartender,
give me a beer." The Bartender draws him a huge glass
of draft, and sits it in front of him. The leprechaun pays
for the beer, turns it up, and chugs the whole glass. As he
wiped the foam from his chin on his sleeve, he scanned the
occupants of the bar. Once he spotted the biggest man in
the bar, he climbed down from the stool, walked over ...
0 Comments, 21 Views,
66 Votes
,5.51 Score |
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tip 7/5/2003
A husband gets back home from work to find his wife sitting
in the corner with a very angry look on her face. She points
to a piece of paper she's found in his pocket when doing
the washing and written on it is the name "SARAH".
<br>
Trouble is his wife's name is Karen. She says "
who the hell is Sarah?"
<br>
As quick as a flash he says "it's ok darling Sarah
was the ...
0 Comments, 66 Views,
84 Votes
,6.96 Score |
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Old Shoe 6/26/2003
Whats the differeance between and old shoe and a old woman?
<br>
Your can eat the old shoe!
0 Comments, 12 Views,
52 Votes
,0.11 Score |
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just a cute 1 6/26/2003
<br>
<br>
what is red and white, and has seven dents ?
snow whites cherry
0 Comments, 8 Views,
52 Votes
,2.06 Score |
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think about it 6/26/2003
what does kodak cameras and a tampax have in common ? they
both capture that perfect moment
0 Comments, 45 Views,
48 Votes
,0.46 Score |
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Hurricane 6/20/2003
Why are women like a hurricane?
<br>
When they come they make a hell of a racket and when they leave
they take the house with them.
1 Comments, 14 Views,
87 Votes
,6.62 Score |
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What's the 2 most useless things in the world? 6/20/2003
A man's tits and the Pope's balls.
0 Comments, 5 Views,
154 Votes
,5.73 Score |
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Three Men In A Dessert 6/17/2003
<br>
Three men were walking aimlessly in the desert. They came
upon a castle. Dying of thirst, they decided to go into the
castle.
<br>
Inside they found no men, just dozens of beautiful women.
The three men decided to stay (obviously, what man wouldn't).
For a week they enjoyed themselves having sex many times
a day with all of the beautiful women.
<br>
...
0 Comments, 12 Views,
214 Votes
,8.86 Score |
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a joke for pure mathmeticians only! 6/13/2003
What do you get if you cross a mountianeer with a scaler?
<br>
Absolutely nothing, you can't cross a scalar with
anything, it's an inverse matrix!!!
<br>
cue laughter from mathmeticians only
0 Comments, 17 Views,
74 Votes
,1.58 Score |
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hairless 6/11/2003
what do you do after eating bald pussy?
<br>
Put the diaper back on!!!
0 Comments, 9 Views,
118 Votes
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STORK 6/11/2003
IF A WHITE STORK DELIVERS A WHITE BABY
<br>
AND
<br>
IF A BLACK STORK DELIVERS A BLACK BABY
<br>
WHAT DELIVERS NO BABY ?
<br>
ANSWER
<br>
A GOOD SWALLOW
0 Comments, 17 Views,
54 Votes
,6.99 Score |
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69 6/10/2003
A young guy goes to a bar. He meets a mature woman who invites
him to her house. When they get there, they start kissing
and getting naked. After a while she asked him: "what
would you like to do?" Being a virgin he wasn't
too sure and told her that anything was okay with him. She
told him to lay on the bed, that they would do a 69. She then
climbed on top of him in a 69 position. After a ...
0 Comments, 30 Views,
97 Votes
,7.91 Score |
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Geisha 6/7/2003
A businesman, visiting Japan, is taken to the local Geisha
house by his japanese host. after a great meal and lots of
Sake, the amorous businessman chooses a lovely young Geisha
and of they go. He sticks it in and she begins moaning "Osotugari,
osotugari!". Harder and harder he pumps, "Osotugari"
she yells. His large western dick pumping into her until
he comes.
<br>
The next ...
0 Comments, 18 Views,
79 Votes
,7.25 Score |
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why women dont fart 6/7/2003
why dont women fart?
<br>
they cant keep their mouths shut long enough to build up
pressure
0 Comments, 6 Views,
107 Votes
,7.45 Score |
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First Assignation 5/29/2003
By first assignation, I mean the first time that I ever met
a woman expressly for the purpose of having sex. I had written
to many women on AdultFriendFinder in the weeks since I joined but only received
a handful of replies. Finally, I began to get somewhere
with one particular woman. We exchanged photos and I was
thrilled with her appearance. She was in her mid 40’s—a
couple of years ...
0 Comments, 37 Views,
87 Votes
,7.34 Score |
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Total Rejection 5/28/2003
What is total rejection?
<br>
Thats when your jerking off and your hand fall asleep....
2 Comments, 80 Views,
93 Votes
,6.80 Score |
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Pregnant woman 5/26/2003
What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light
bulb?
<br>
You can unscrew a light bulb.
0 Comments, 18 Views,
86 Votes
,3.98 Score |
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naked downtown 5/25/2003
This guy is standing on a corner in the middle of town, naked,
looking around. A cop pulls up and arrests him for exposure.
He asks the man to explain what he's doing standing
there like that. He' say's "It's like
this officer. I was at this party, and someone suggested
all the women take their clothes off. They did! Then someone
suggested that all the men take their clothes off too. We ...
0 Comments, 9 Views,
120 Votes
,4.05 Score |
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Pussy and Parsley 5/24/2003
Do you know the difference between pussy and parsley?
<br>
Nobody eats parsley!
0 Comments, 10 Views,
86 Votes
,4.02 Score |
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Old couple 5/24/2003
An old couple were having dinner in an italian restaruant.
The old man looks at his wife and gets an evil grin on his face.
<br>
"You 'member the first time were here?"
He asks.
<br>
"I sure do. We made love like animals against the fence
in the back." She replied.
<br>
"You wanna do it again?" He asks.
<br>
She only laughed and said, "Follow ...
0 Comments, 52 Views,
148 Votes
,8.56 Score |
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Two men 5/20/2003
A man is hanging from the edge of the Empire State Building
and across town another man is getting head from a 98 year
old woman with no teeth. What advice would you give them
both??? Don't look down
0 Comments, 22 Views,
54 Votes
,3.47 Score |
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A Letter From A Redneck Mother To Her 5/16/2003
Dear ,
<br>
I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't
read fast. We don't live where
we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most
accidents happen
within twenty miles of home, so we moved. Won't be able
to send you the
address as the last Arkansasfamily that lived here took
the numbers with
them for their new house, so they wouldn't have to change ...
0 Comments, 47 Views,
146 Votes
,7.67 Score |
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Dr., lawyer, and a priest 5/14/2003
A doctor a lawyer and a priest were standing out side a burning
school house the Dr. said help someone save the .
The lawyer said FUCK!!! the , The priest look
at him and said do we have the time?????
0 Comments, 7 Views,
89 Votes
,5.52 Score |
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Da bloody mary 5/11/2003
How do you know when a female bartender doesn't like
you?
<br>
<br>
<br>
They'll be a tampon in your bloody mary!
0 Comments, 6 Views,
53 Votes
,0.99 Score |
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Intelligent Blond 5/9/2003
What do you call an intelligent blond?
GOLDEN RETRIEVER
0 Comments, 9 Views,
109 Votes
,7.21 Score |
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Olympic Condoms 5/7/2003
A man comes home with a huge grin on his face & says to
his wife, Hey Honey why don't you run upstairs &
put on something sexy, I got a real treat for you, I just
bought a pack of those new Olympic condoms & I'm
going to wear the Gold one for you tonight, She looks at him
with a sarcastic grin then says, Sure thing honey but why
don't you wear the Silver one instead & come second
for a ...
0 Comments, 30 Views,
130 Votes
,7.85 Score |
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Village Moron goes into the bar .. 5/4/2003
The village moron goes into the bar, says Hi to the barman,
orders his drink. Dave the barman greets him and says ..
Your looking pretty pleased with yourself tonight Mike,
what have you been up to? " Well Dave, I am". "You
know I live near the railway line don't you"?
"Yes"says Dave. "I was on my way home the
other night, and I saw this beautiful blonde tied up on the
railway tracks". ...
0 Comments, 10 Views,
107 Votes
,4.08 Score |
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Honeymoon 5/4/2003
A couple arrives at their honeymoon suite and starts to
get undressed. The groom removes his shoes and sox, and
his wife starts laughing. He asks what she is laughing at,
and she says your toes. He says when I was a boy I had toelio.
She says you mean polio, and he says no, I had toelio. He removes
his trousers, and she starts laughing again. Now whats
so funny, he asks. Your knees, she ...
0 Comments, 13 Views,
79 Votes
,3.57 Score |
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The old folks 5/3/2003
A husband and wife had been married many many years. They
made an appointment with their Dr. because it seemed like
they were always tired. The Dr. took both of them and gave
them each a thorough checkup. Then, he took them both into
his office to give them the news. He starts out by telling
them that he sees only 1 reason that they are so tired all
the time.
At your age, you have got to ...
0 Comments, 113 Views,
71 Votes
,6.87 Score |